– I had a relative who was very fair-skinned. So fair that I thought she was Caucasian. When I was 7 years old that relative pulled me to the side and told me I was too black, and I would never get married because I was too dark, and nobody would want me. I didn’t say anything back to her, I just went back to playing. But that stuck with me. Before she said that to me, I never thought about my complexion. I didn’t know I was dark-skinned because no one had mentioned it. I never told anyone till about 5 years ago that she had said it to me. I thought I’d pushed it to the back of my mind. But it wasn’t until elementary 5th grade, to be exact, that I developed this crush on a boy from school. He was so handsome. But I never dared to tell him I liked him. One day out of nowhere he told me “You’re so black, too black”. And the memory I had of that relative resurfaced almost like she had just said it to me. And I thought to myself she was right, no one will ever want me because I’m too dark. By the time I got to high school, I was convinced that I needed to bleach my skin. The internet wasn’t like today, but I started researching creams and things that would brighten my skin. But eventually, I got past the hurtful comments of those that made me feel less than. I began to accept that this is the way God made me, I’m a reflection of his image and I’m wonderfully made. Going back to that relative, see she was married to an openly unfaithful man. He trotted around his mistresses like they were a part of the family and right in front of her. There was never any discretion. It wasn’t until yesterday that a friend of mine told me, “you realize that the women he cheated with were your complexion.” I thought further about it, all these years I couldn’t understand why she would say something like that to a child. But now I know it had nothing to do with me. It was because she was hurt, and I possibly reminded her of that hurt. Hurt people, tend to hurt people. Rather it be unintentional or intentional. That relative passed away decades ago. But those painful words have been in the back of my mind for just as many decades as she’s been gone. Now I must release them. Let go of that hurt and give her the same grace that I expect GOD to give me. I leave you with this. What the world sees isn’t what GOD sees. Our beauty is within and it’s how we carry ourselves and love ourselves that makes it radiate outward. Speak affirmations over yourself daily and over your children. We are all wonderfully and uniquely made in his image. We are not meant to be the same as the person next to us. Each person on this earth is a pearl rare and priceless. So, in a sea of ordinary, be a Pearl.
Affirmation
“I am what GOD made me to be. I radiate love, kindness, and grace around everyone I encounter. I am beautiful because I am made in GOD’s image.”
-Shar Michele